Non-Jews are for practice
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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