your thong is hanging out like whoa
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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