Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
