You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Randomize
