Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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