Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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