# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Randomize
