I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
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