he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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