Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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