The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Randomize
