He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
