some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Define "chronic" masturbator.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize