hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
