I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
