i just had sex bonerless
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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