I think I am morally bankrupt
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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