Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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