But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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