D3 body, D1 cock
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
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