Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize