Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
