Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
