none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
