i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
handjob tips. give me some.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize