i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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