oh god the rape fog is back!
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
