Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
how can u be prego again
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
