Where is the hickey?
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
