i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
