I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
