So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
