When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
