Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize