Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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