I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I currently don't understand fingers.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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