So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
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