Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
