There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
My life is pants optional.
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