fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
