Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
