FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize