Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
