Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
