He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize