Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize