U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
