my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
