Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Randomize