best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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