I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
